Halfway to 50!

Twenty somethings unite!

Hey Jiggly Butt! April 29, 2011


We never grew up with a scale in our house.  Nobody was overweight or even worried about weight, so there was no reason to have such a judgemental tool lying on the bathroom floor.

This is why I was shocked at Easter when I went to my parents house and found one, lit up and glaring at me.

My brother, being as surprised as I was, decided it would be fun if everyone would weigh-in to determine their “pre-Easter meal” weight.  Then on Sunday (well you know what’s coming) after stuffing our faces with mounds of food, we’d all weigh in again to see what we’d gained.  Being a rather tall, gangly bunch, this wasn’t offensive to anyone and we decided it would be a fun family activity.  I mean, what better way to celebrate Jesus’ rise from the tomb than with a weigh-in?

Here’s where it went from funny to pathetic.  I got on the scale and wrinkled my forehead.  Huh?  I’ve been the same weight for years and was surprised to see that number change.  I got off and back on again.  Dammit.  An electronic scale doesn’t lie.  I looked at myself in the bathroom mirror.  I wiggled my arms.  No flapping skin.  I turned to the side.  No protruding stomach.  I turned around and craned by neck to see the back of my legs.  No chubby legs.  Hmmmm.  I turned to the front and laughed at my own funny thought.  No, those few pounds were not added to my chest… I couldn’t be that lucky!  Oh well, I’ve been lifting a lot of weights over the past year so maybe it’s the added muscle.  I went about my business, enjoyed Easter, and didn’t think twice about those new pounds… until Thursday.

I was bent over digging through a filing cabinet in my classroom.  My students were busily working (most of them) when I felt a tap on my butt.  My eyes bugged out of my head and my heart dropped.  Oh my gosh.  My butt just jigged like crazy.  It was like a rock was thrown into a pond causing ripples to form.  I slowly turned around to tend to the student who needed me and quietly sat down in my chair.  I found the location of those new pounds.  My ass.  How can this be?  I’ve been lifting weights and running regularly!!  I don’t deserve this!  (Ok, maybe an exaggeration of my reaction, but I was pretty pissed.)

As I sat chewing my pizza last night, I discussed my ass with my hubbie.  He laughed as I went on and on about my jiggly butt that was poked by a student.  Determined to convince him that my butt had indeed grown, I stood up, bent over, and patted my own ass to show him how it reacted.  (Looking back, I don’t understand why I went to this extreme, but the point got across.) 

The morale of this story?  Owning a scale is stupid.  Weight is just a number.  Be sure you add some butt lifts to your daily workout.  Cheers to all 20 something asses that creep up and say “boo” when you least expect it!

 

25 in the Midwest March 28, 2011


Are expectations different depending on where you live?

I had this thought today as I was driving to the gym.  I had Cosmo Radio on in the car and was listening to a segment called, Cocktails with Patrick or Cocks with P (if you’re feeling a little sassy!)  He was on a roll delivering a strong message about being 25 years old to his co-host.  Apparently she is 25 and he was telling her to relish every moment of this time, because it only goes downhill from there. 

After you’ve all stopped gasping, continue reading please.  He was telling her that she is at her prime physically, emotionally, and sexually.  He went as far as to tell her that she should throw herself a party tonight to celebrate this wonderful age!  But what really got me was when he asked her about her “old” friends, you know, those girlfriends she has who are 28 or 29 years old.  (There was even a moment where they referred to these women as “golden girls!”  Their words, not mine.)  If asked, he believed every one of them would turn back the clock 4 years.  Why? Because they have more pressure and responsibility now.  Together they listed the things that cause pressure and responsibility when you are in your late 20’s like careers, marriage, and babies.  He advised his halfway to 50 co-host to truly soak up every moment of her carefree existence right now before she becomes engulfed in life’s expectations.

Here is where my head spun around.  What he is talking about??  I’m 25, four years into my career, married, and paying a monthly mortgage.  My halfway to 50 life is full of responsibility and pressure!  Now, please don’t think I’m complaining.  I chose every element of my life and love what it has become.  I have a career that I’m passionate about, a husband who adores me, and a home that we’ve created together that someday we’ll raise children in.  So why does this radio host believe 25 year olds are free of responsibility?  Am I crazy or is he?  Where I come from, once you graduate college, you get a move on with life.  It is still filled with fun and excitement, but you have to work for it.

Most of my friends were married in their early 20’s and many are starting to have children.  We all have jobs because, well, who else is going to pay the bills?  We have fun on the weekends and work hard during the week.  We haven’t thrown in the towel on our youth yet, but still take on a lot of responsibility. 

Two of my best friends are not married.  Both have come to me with concerns about their age and the increasing pressure to marry soon.  They’re great girls with good jobs, amazing families, and dazzling personalities.  So why are they worried?  Because they want security, love, and, babies before they’re 30.  Most of the time these conversations turn to the idea that people our age in other areas of the country are partying, carefree, and starring in reality shows about living in a beach house. 

I guess what I’m saying is if I was born in Los Angeles, maybe I’d be running around from bar to bar, flirting with muscle laden bronzed men, working a temp job as a dog walker, and living in a run down apartment on the beach.  The only responsibilities I’d have is to sweep the sand off the floor at night, keep enough protection in the house for my gentlemen callers, and keep an ample supply of sunscreen on hand for my tanning sessions.

So my final thought to you is, does region determine the expectation on you and your age?  Do you think you’d have a different life if you grew up elsewhere?  What is society’s current expectation of you?

 

How do you know it’s love? February 14, 2011


As someone who married her high school sweetheart, I’d like to think I know a little something about being in love.  I’m not an expert on love, but I believe I’ve learned a few signs that show its true love between you and that special someone.  Even though I’ve been in love for 11 years, the kind of love we share has evolved over time.  You can and should fall in love again and again with that special someone.  This happens because the love you share changes as you grow together.  In my case, it changed when we learned how to drive, when we graduated, when we entered college, when we got engaged, when we got married, and then as we’ve shared our life together over the past couple of years.  The following, in my experience, are the top 10 ways you know it’s love…

10. You share the last piece of… anything! 

 If there is one piece of bread left in the basket at a restaurant, neither of us will just grab it and scarf it.  Instead, one of us takes it, breaks it in half, and the other person gets to choose which half they want.  Silly?  Maybe.  But I feel it’s so important to still share with each other, no matter how long you’ve been together.

9. You feel comfortable announcing that you are going to the bathroom and say exactly what you’ll be doing in there.

I know, I know.  This may seem nasty to some people, but once you get to know someone really well and then live with them, this becomes second nature.  Often times it isn’t necessary, but it just comes out like word vomit.  I couldn’t fathom announcing that he should “stay clear of the bathroom for a few minutes” when we were dating.  Now, I feel like its common courtesy to give him a heads up to avoid an unwelcome surprise.  That’s love.

8. He’ll accompany you, no matter where you’re going.

Whether it’s your parents’ house or a spin at the Gap.  Someone who really loves you will go with you.  Although my husband frantically searches for a chair the moment we step into the Gap, it is important to note that he is there!  He hates shopping, but will go with me because he loves me.  He’ll drag his feet through Express and The Loft and happily answer me when I burst out of the dressing room saying, “How does this look?”  Ok, so he doesn’t happily answer.  He’s usually rubbing his forehead and bouncing his knee nervously.  BUT, he’s there.  For me!

7. He learns to love chick flicks!

Although resistant at first, my husband has come to not only tolerate, but enjoy movies like How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days, Serendipity, and The Holiday.  I don’t think the story line is what draws him in, I think it’s knowing that it makes me happy to watch these movies together.  It probably doesn’t hurt to watch Kate Hudson and Jennifer Aniston in all their glory, but again, I like to think it’s because he loves me!

6. He doesn’t judge you based on your music, clothing, TV, or food choices.

I can be scarfing down peanut butter M&M’s by the handful in my two inches too short pajama pants, while watching Teen Mom and my adoring husband doesn’t even flinch.  This probably isn’t the picture he had in his mind of me when we began dating, but once you live with someone, that kind of goes out the window.  Being in love means you can be yourself in front of your husband.  But keep in mind, this means I must also be accepting of the nearly see-through sweatpants he’s had since college and obsession with Captain Crunch cereal.  Which I am.  Usually.

5. He calls you back when you’re upset.

We’ve all been there.  You get in an argument with your significant other.  Your voice gets shaky and you don’t want to get upset in front of him.  So you insist everything is fine, hang up the phone and cry.  If he loves you, he’ll call you back and make sure you’re happy before you go to sleep.  This happened while we dated in high school, college, and now as we’re married.  My husband travels for work sometimes so we still use the phone often to communicate.  He will absolutely not let me go to bed upset.  The same goes when we’re home together.  We do not go to bed upset.  That is true love.

4. He still manages to smile and laugh as you belt out terrible karaoke.

After a few drinks, I like to sing karaoke (see previous post.)  I’ve been known to sing Vanilla Ice, Sir Mix-A-Lot, and Britney Spears after consuming a few adult beverages.  Only a man in love will watch and crack up at a tipsy girl’s rendition of Baby Got Back and then hug her after she’s done. 

3. He’ll write you love notes and you’ll write back.

I went to high school about 8 years ago.  There was no texting (hard to believe!!)  If my husband (my boyfriend at the time) wanted to say “hey” or “I love you” he did it through a note.  We were young, but so in love.  He wasn’t too proud to write his feelings in a note and that’s what made me love him.  Want to know the crazy thing?  I still have every single note he ever wrote me 🙂

2. No time to shave your legs?  No problem!

I’ve only been married a couple of years, but it’s wonderful to not worry about having perfectly smooth legs at all times.  I used to feel that way.  Now don’t get me wrong, I haven’t let myself go or fallen apart completely, but sometimes it’s just a pain in the ass to shave your legs!  Having a husband who loves me regardless, makes me less self-conscious about my leg stubble.  Gotta love marriage!

1.  He’ll hold your hand in the car, church, Target, or in bed.

My guy’s a hand holder.  At first it was in the halls of our high school.  Then it was throughout campus on the way to class.  Now it’s while we sit in church or watch TV in bed at night.  I wasn’t much of a hand holder until he came along, but it turns out to be a great way to show someone you’re in love.  Ever since we were 16 he’s held my hand in the car.  There’s something so simple and so sweet about hand holding.  I hope it never ends.  I can already see us in our motorized wheel chairs cruising the halls of our retirement home hand in hand.  Sigh. 

Happy Valentines Day to all of the couples who are in love and to those seeking love.  It’s an amazing feeling that I hope everyone gets to experience at some point in their life!